Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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