Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
do herpes really smell.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
