OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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