I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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