i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Randomize
