I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize