y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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