wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
