I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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