Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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