nut hugger
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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