Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
