I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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