i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
