someone get that fucking seahorse.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
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