i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
