bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
try to milk me bitch
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