I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize