i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize