in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders