U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
the evidence from last night is not good...
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.