Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
