so that wasnt chicken after all
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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