office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I pour the whiskey from now on
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
