What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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