i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
