i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
ok first of all what the fuck
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