he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I wear drunk well.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
