escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I need to calm my uterus...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
