I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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