Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  Me and my dog bond so much when im high.

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  (407): Me and my dog bond so much when im high. http://tfl.nu/9nf2
  Replies (66) Good night (7374) Bad night (806)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.

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  (352): if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong. http://tfl.nu/rar8
  Replies (20) Good night (3811) Bad night (735)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.

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  (308): Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies. http://tfl.nu/eijo
  Replies (20) Good night (7919) Bad night (726)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems

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  (609): i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems http://tfl.nu/8tgm
  Replies (31) Good night (1547) Bad night (4850)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.

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  (718): Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober. http://tfl.nu/eick
  Replies (13) Good night (6456) Bad night (1520)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.

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  (774): and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date. http://tfl.nu/kedp
  Replies (15) Good night (3221) Bad night (784)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am

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  (605): im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am http://tfl.nu/dc3c
  Replies (9) Good night (3290) Bad night (1158)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.

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  (612): You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship. http://tfl.nu/eji2
  Replies (10) Good night (4150) Bad night (888)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.

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  (503): I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan. http://tfl.nu/4npq
  Replies (12) Good night (3280) Bad night (1802)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here

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  (850): Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here http://tfl.nu/668w
  Replies (9) Good night (631) Bad night (1582)
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  (278): View more from Michigan

  Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.

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  (278): Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms. http://tfl.nu/bwzb
  Replies (2) Good night (1153) Bad night (343)
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  (914): View more from New York

  They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.

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  (914): They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies. http://tfl.nu/g6fw
  Replies (3) Good night (877) Bad night (386)
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  (516): View more from New York

  We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom

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  (516): We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom http://tfl.nu/tkh6
  Replies (8) Good night (2246) Bad night (582)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...

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  (360): Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one... http://tfl.nu/mmlz
  Replies (2) Good night (780) Bad night (369)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho

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  (+61): And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho http://tfl.nu/t3gn
  Replies (1) Good night (424) Bad night (268)

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