I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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