scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
