Sponge bath it is.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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