I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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