see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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