...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize