This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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