yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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