was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
