I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
