i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
