My sheets look like a crime scene.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
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All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
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The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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