he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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