I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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