got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
