i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
