she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
