Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
