We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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