idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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