Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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